{"id":1803,"date":"2017-12-18T14:21:47","date_gmt":"2017-12-18T19:21:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/?p=1803"},"modified":"2017-12-19T23:46:36","modified_gmt":"2017-12-20T04:46:36","slug":"im-not-old-ive-just-been-here-a-long-time","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/2017\/12\/18\/im-not-old-ive-just-been-here-a-long-time\/","title":{"rendered":"I’m Not Old I’ve Just Been Here A Long Time"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/h6>\n
When I was a young girl I used to dream of being all grown up, doing whatever I wanted to do, with no one to tell me what to do, or, where to go, but these are the thoughts of the immature\u2026childish day dreams\u2026<\/h6>\n
Looking back on those days I smile and give a little sigh\u2026I\u2019ve come to learn that those wishes are no more true than the ones I have today\u2026I\u2019ve walked through some heavy rains\u2026waited out many storms\u2026the trek of life is not easy and it\u2019s not meant to be I guess. The years with seasons come and go, day in, and day out, thoughts of what was and what is and what\u2019s to come, still wander through my mind.<\/h6>\n
Getting older the body slows down, grows stiff and weak\u2026giving the mind lots of time to think about many things\u2026<\/h6>\n
I watched my mother grow old, become feeble but gained a whole lot of wisdom. I saw her grow stronger in the Lord, she\u2019d read her Bible and learned to take One-day-at-a-time\u2026and I watched her take her last breaths and move on into the next life\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve grieved and missed her ever since\u2026<\/h6>\n
Sometimes, now, I see her looking back at me through my eyes\u2026the eyes she gave me\u2026I look down and see her hands\u2026once young and flawless\u2026now wisdom spots begin to emerge and fingers get tired\u2026I get up to sweep the floor and it\u2019s a real challenge to stand. Bones creak and struggle under the load of the body \u2026the aging process progresses as it should\u2026<\/h6>\n
I laugh and joke about age and repeat mama\u2019s words, \u201cI\u2019m not old; I\u2019ve just been here a long time.\u201d<\/h6>\n
I watch my sons growing older too\u2026as they have families of their own. Living their lives and learning as they go.<\/h6>\n
I know the curse of divorce, as it hits families with a terrible force, and I pray\u2026 \u201cOh God, help them.\u201d I know the devastation of such things and what it will mean in years to come. Brokenness, regret, loneliness, extended families, hurt and pain\u2026Life is hard\u2026but God is good.<\/h6>\n
My perfect dream was to have a family and a home where there would be Christmas dinners and long talks about memories we all share\u2026My perfect dream was buying that special gift that would bring Ah\u2019s to the receiver and see the joy on my grandchildren\u2019s faces of wonder and delight, sparkles in their eyes. Laughter and happy moments as years would go by. But there are no perfect dreams\u2026only life.<\/h6>\n
They say life is what you make it. Maybe that\u2019s true. But I think if it was true I\u2019d have made mine a lot different. The thing is you don\u2019t know how it\u2019s going to turn out until years down the road. One things for certain if you are blessed to live a long, hard, life\u2026you get to enjoy the good and the not so good\u2026God has all our days numbered and I\u2019m most grateful for coming to know him when I was a young-girl and that my grandmother and my mother taught me to have faith in God. It\u2019s His grace that has kept me all these years.<\/h6>\n
All I know is that we should be grateful for the relationships we have in our lives and celebrate each person for who they are. You know, Love doesn\u2019t cost one penny\u2026yet it is the most valuable of anything in this world. I am not talking about selfish love, because well that isn\u2019t love at all.<\/h6>\n
I\u2019m talking about a Love that is giving. It\u2019s selfless, honest, pure, faithful, not angry, it doesn\u2019t seek its own desires\u2026it\u2019s a Love that is holy\u2026it\u2019s a love that puts others first and does not gossip or kill or harm\u2026the Love I\u2019m talking about only comes from one source, it is supernatural and cannot be bought or sold\u2026 it cannot be shattered or wasted\u2026this Love comes from the creator of Love\u2026For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish but have everlasting life…John 3:16 I learned this verse as a child. I have never forgotten it. It\u2019s so very important to teach children to memorize Scripture.<\/strong><\/em> It sustains us throughout our life. It gives us wisdom and insight. It is God\u2019s living word.<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve traveled many roads\u2026seen foreign lands and known many people\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve written a whole lot of words\u2026and read many books\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve been a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, mother-in-law, and a friend\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve done things I\u2019m not proud of and done many things I\u2019m glad I did\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve enjoyed the miracle of motherhood and suffered the loss of loved ones through their death\u2026missing them knowing one day I\u2019ll see them again\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019ve been young and now am old\u2026I\u2019ve lived through seven decades and witnessed many changes in this ole world\u2026<\/h6>\n
There have been twelve U.S. Presidents in my life-time so far\u2026<\/h6>\n
Lately I\u2019ve been pondering all these things and life appears to be surreal\u2026the world I knew is nothing like the world I\u2019m living in\u2026<\/h6>\n
People now connect through technology\u2026reminds me of Alex Haley\u2019s Brave New World<\/em>\u2026only it\u2019s not so brave and not so new\u2026but the test tube babies\u2026and virtual reality, we are now witnessing day-dreams coming to life\u2026I don\u2019t seem to fit here\u2026and yet I\u2019m called to a purpose\u2026God does not change\u2026He is still the same\u2026if our ancestors of over 2000 years ago lived today\u2026can you imagine waking up after over 2000 years in the year 2017\u2026well that\u2019s how I feel\u2026<\/h6>\n
Like I\u2019m living in a world that is unfamiliar to me\u2026a world I don\u2019t understand and cannot fathom for the life of me\u2026how it became so sick\u2026words are twisted and don\u2019t mean what they are supposed to mean\u2026morals are laughed at\u2026doing what\u2019s right is looked down upon and every perversion known and unknown is accepted\u2026<\/h6>\n
I can imagine how John the Baptist must have felt and Paul and the disciples and Bonhoeffer, men who fought evil, and gave their lives for a world that held no place for them\u2026they looked forward to another world\u2026where love and joy and peace is practiced and lived. No threat of hate or death. This is not a fantasy\u2026this is reality\u2026<\/h6>\n
As Christians we are living in this world but we are not to be of it\u2026living without judgments\u2026forgive always\u2026stay true to who you know, and what you know\u2026<\/h6>\n
With age comes wisdom and responsibility. A responsibility to proclaim, to warn, to shout WAKE UP\u2026<\/h6>\n
As the old song goes\u2026This world is not my home\u2026I\u2019m just a passing through\u2026my treasures are laid up, somewhere beyond the blue\u2026the angels beckon me from heaven\u2019s open door, and I can\u2019t, feel at home, in this world anymore\u2026<\/em><\/h6>\n
O Lord you know I have no friend like you, if heaven\u2019s not my home dear Lord what will I do\u2026the angels beckon me from heaven\u2019s open door and I can\u2019t feel at home in this world anymore\u2026<\/em><\/h6>\n
I love my sons and daughters-in-law and grandbabies\u2026I love my husband and extended family. I love my friends and all those God has placed within my path. I pray for all those who are lost and haven\u2019t found their way yet\u2026<\/h6>\n
I\u2019m going to live until I die\u2026and while I\u2019m here\u2026I will write and pray and read and laugh and keep on going until\u00a0my last breath…\u00a0I’LL PROCLAIM\u2026the Gospel of Jesus Christ\u2026Amen!!! For He is My PASSION!<\/h6>\n
Growing old is a blessing, especially\u00a0when we know we are forever young\u2026<\/h6>\n
~M.S. O\u2019Neill December 18, 2017<\/h6>\n
Proverbs 16:31 The Message (MSG) <\/em><\/strong>Gray hair is a mark of distinction, the award for a God-loyal life.<\/em><\/h6>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When I was a young girl I used to dream of being all grown up, doing whatever I wanted to do, with no one to tell me what to do, or, where to go, but these are the thoughts of the immature\u2026childish day dreams\u2026 Looking back on those days I smile and give a little…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1803","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8aPxH-t5","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1803","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1803"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1803\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1819,"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1803\/revisions\/1819"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1803"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1803"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/becourageousbebold.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1803"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}